I Just Don’t See a Guy Doing This – Jordana del Feld – Medium

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I Just Don’t See a Guy Doing This – Jordana


We were devastated to see our son’s Best Teacher Ever leave at the end of the school year. In Montessori tradition she was supposed to go with the kids through the grades, but instead she moved to LA.

“See, this is what happens when you make it so nobody can afford to live here any more,” I sighed bitterly.

The new teacher wasn’t nearly so good.

So I was surprised to see her, visiting the school a year later. “Can you believe that jerk who broke my heart is already married, and it’s just a year later? She doesn’t even speak English!” said the Best Teacher Ever, directly after saying hello.

Huh, I thought. “Yeah, he’s why I left. I couldn’t stand being in this city after he left me: it reminded me too much of our time together.”

Wait what?

Apparently not a money problem. Now I could blame some useless wanker on the loss of the Best Teacher Ever.

The day after I ran into the BTE, I was talking with a woman who had a permanent rent-free Victorian home in one of the nicest neighbourhoods in town, who I knew had also moved to LA. I was surprised she was back. How could someone who worked as a part-time yoga teacher and had, as far as I knew, no other source of income, survive in this town? LA had made a lot of sense financially.

“That painting there was by Him. My Boyfriend,” she said, lip quivering, pointing to a terrible painting. “He left a bunch of stuff here actually.” She indicated an essential oils distributor, gesturing as if it were the Holy Grail. “He broke my heart, that’s why I left and moved to LA. I couldn’t stand being in this city after he left me: it reminded me too much of our time together.”

I hadn’t even known this was a thing, and now here were two women in two days saying the same thing.

All I could think, after each Noble Confession, was that the guys in question almost certainly had not felt that they had to uproot their lives and throw away jobs, housing, and community traction in the most expensive city in the country, just because of breaking up.

The guys, I suspected, had gone out and lived their lives. Why couldn’t the women do so too?



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